San Jose, Silicon Valley, Santa Cruz and San Francisco

| Sophie

So it’s been an amazing 11 days in NorCal staying with my aunt, uncle, Charchie and cousins in Los Gatos in Silicon Valley. I’ve explored a lot in the time I’ve been here, but of course there’s always more to see and more to do!

I’m not quite sure what I expected from my first trip to the states, but it wasn’t really that. I arrived on a sunny day and immediately felt like the flora, weather and architecture was reminiscent of Southern Spain. Los Gatos is a colourful, clean and beautiful town with a healthy, rich vibe. Certainly a lovely place to live complete with good schools and easy access to the beach, Santa Cruz, San Francisco and massive outlet stores.

I was given the tour of Silicon Valley and saw the HeadQuarters of Facebook, Google, Apple, Roku/Netflix, and shown where the owners of Snapchat and Whatsapp live, as they’re in the same neighbourhood as my family. Tech capital of the world indeed. The money in Los Gatos is evident in absolutely everything. The streets are pristine, each house is a work of art with architectural styles from all over the world, the flowers are colourful and healthy, the cars were all top of the range, and it’s a safe place to live. My aunt and uncle had neighbours popping round exchanging figs and limes that grew in their gardens, there was someone jogging past the window every time you glanced out onto the streets, wild rabbits played easily in the gardens and the sun shined every day.

Google HQ
Apple HQ
Anthropologie
A cool building

Gentrification is a big problem around San Francisco and San Jose. Because it is the Tech capital of the world, big earners are flooding into the neighbourhoods outbidding all the poorer communities which had given SF and SJ its soulful personality back when the city was building up. The house prices are extortionate which reflect the local economy.

Never the less it was fascinating seeing the HQ’s of these world-dominating tech companies. Also, we visited Stanford University which was incredible. No.2 university in the whole world, and one of the most beautiful. Palm trees line the roads approaching the uni; each building has its own character however the whole complex fits together so well, and is very well maintained.

San Francisco is super edgy, artsy, liberal, run down, chic, open-minded, multicultural, beautiful, interesting, and above all, just cool. The architecture is stunning. Each house screams out the personality of its owner and you’ll often see liberal political opinions written on the walls, signposted in windows and represented by colourful graffiti. You get houses in every different colour and style, from Victorian, to European, to Indian, to classic american, to Arabic… name a prominent culture and you can find houses that look like they belong there in San Francisco. It certainly is not a bike friendly place, the hills are absolutely insane and sometimes even a bit scary to drive down. Shout out to my amazing tour guides Sierra and Grace who gave me an insight into the culture I never would have got on my own. And shout out to Sierra for being such a patient photographer. I managed to time my visit concurrently with the hottest day in San Francisco on record, ever. 40 degree heat is just not fun to walk around in.

Me and Sierra also explored surfer town Santa Cruz with its edgy undercurrent full of thrift shops and run-down book stores. The boardwalk is like a mini theme park contained on a small beach, and there’s a long pier with restaurants and fish markets. The sea is littered with surfers in long wetsuits due to the icy cold pacific sea, and there’s a fog that hangs in the air most days.

All in all it was a great 2 weeks and I thoroughly enjoyed staying with my aunt and uncle. They made me feel so so welcome and I will definitely go back there on my way home. California has been added to my ‘could live there’ list.

Onwards to South America!

 

Take Off

| Sophie

I’ve been waiting all summer for moments of inspiration, flashes of thought that creep down into my hands, urging me to write. But they have eluded me. I think writing is an art, for which you need creativity, passion and a purpose. It’s not like maths or science where you apply logic or reason to which there is only one true solution. As with all the arts, you can develop the instinct to write and with practice it becomes easier to skilfully tap into that, however for a beginner like me who’s immersed in science, it’s been quite hard to let my creative juices flow. So now is the time to put pen to paper (metaphorically; fingertips to keyboard doesn’t have quite the same ring) and start writing again. I want to document my imminent adventure, develop my skills as a writer and communicator, and share my discoveries: personal and professional. For I am going on a journey along a path less trodden. Out into the wilderness where my basic human instincts will be fine-tuned, and my need to impress and satisfy my self-worth upon Western standards will diminish.

This is my second long trip. My first was 18 months in Australia and Asia. I’m heading to a different part of the world this time: South America for 1 year. It’s quite exciting really, I go in the pursuit of knowledge and learning, rather than on a path of fun and self-discovery as was the case when I was 18.

I was lucky enough to be offered a research placement at the Timburi Cocha research station in the Amazon Rainforest in Ecuador, in order to complete a research project of my own during the placement year of my degree. Originally I was not enrolled on a degree with a placement year, however I made the decision to intersect my 3 year BSc with a year in industry while I was in my first year.

Before I tell you how excited I am, I want to preface that with a short summary of my first two years of uni. I study Biomedical Sciences at The University of Manchester: the biggest uni in the UK and situated in the heart of the northern capital. I chose Manchester because of its good reputation, the variety of modules and specialities available to me and the allure of a busy, metropolitan city. I can say, hand on heart, that Manchester has lived up to those expectations. I have loved most of my modules and I’m so grateful for the amount of choice I’ve been offered. I’ve studied some absolutely fascinating topics, from the more mainstream such as Biochemistry, Endocrinology, Genetics etc. to topics a little off the beaten track such as Parasitology and Gut and Renal Physiology. The city of Manchester is beautiful, offers a lot of culture and night life, and I don’t think I’ll ever run out of things to do there; and true to its name, Manchester boasts some of the best researchers and academics in the country, and is home to some major scientific discoveries.

Despite this glossy exterior, my experience at Manchester hasn’t been the easiest. For the two years I was there, I couldn’t escape this sense of isolation and loneliness. Even though Manchester has the highest student population in the UK, I never felt like I fitted in, or belonged, or truly ever found my niche. I had great friends, who are great people I would love to always keep in contact with and follow their journeys through life, I was also part of a sports team and had a job at uni. The issue wasn’t the quantity of my social interactions, more the quality. Everyone has a billion and one things to do and places to be, with their own agendas and priorities, and I just didn’t seem to make the cut. That’s what it felt like anyway. Perhaps I’m studying the wrong degree, hence I’m not surrounded by like-minded people; I’ve always fancied studying philosophy. In fact, I still might. Perhaps being an old soul and older in age created a distance between me and the people around me that was intangible but still unbearable. Perhaps, I didn’t prioritise my own social life as much as I needed to, because at the time I felt like there were more important things to do, like earn money, exercise and sleep. Too responsible for my own good.

So this summer I decided to take a bit of time to rest and recuperate. I prioritised my immediate friends and family, fitness classes that I enjoyed, and making decisions based on what I wanted to do rather than what I thought I should do or what was expected of me. I actually feel a lot better now, much more centred and fulfilled. But it wasn’t until I walked through Heathrow airport this morning that I realised what’s really been missing. Adventure. My soul yearns for it. If routine and conformity make me unwell, then travel and adventure are my antidote. So here I am, sitting on a plane heading to San Francisco, at the start of my next big adventure. It’s in moments like this where I truly feel like myself.

I’m visiting my aunt, uncle, grandmother and cousins in San Jose for two weeks before heading to the jungle. Over the last couple of years I’ve learnt a lot more about the USA and its culture, and I’m so excited to go there and experience a little bit of it myself and have a good catch up with my family. My life has turned in a direction I did not at all expect, not for a second, and I’m so excited.

Then in the beginning of September, I fly to Quito, the capital of Ecuador, where I’m staying for 6 days in order to explore the city and orientate myself, as well as complete a few missions like buying wellies / a hammock / a blanket and a few jumpers. I then fly to Coca with Heather, my placement buddy, where we’ll be picked up by the station manager, Javier, and escorted to the station. The station is situated in the amazon, and I will write all about what it’s like and put pictures up as soon as I get there and figure it out for myself.

Our purpose at the station is to complete a research project which will count 10% towards our final mark. We will spend the year deciding on a hypothesis (the big question, what do we actually want to find out), gathering data, (field work, getting the answers), analysing that data and compiling it into a report which we can then present and communicate our findings. The main area of research at the station is biodiversity in the rainforest, however after reading all about the station, its location, aims and involvement in the local community, I have set my heart on doing a public health project regarding diseases, healthcare and medicines in the local, indigenous communities. I would love to learn all about their common diseases and how they cure them, then perhaps compare them with a Western Medicine alternative. Or investigate why their own medicines are so effective, what is it in their remedies that are so effective at treating their diseases? I want to tap into their knowledge of how to survive in the rainforest and learn from them. The difficult part will be constructing a hypothesis where I can actually gather binary data in order to prove or disprove a fundamental question. I don’t need all the answers right away. I’ll have a few months to settle in and do a bit of research before I start my project.

So I’ll sign off now and end this post with a few goals and a few fears. Goal no. 1: come up with a research proposal so interesting I can’t not spend every day finding out the answer; goal no. 2: learn Spanish; goal no. 3: live in the moment, in the present, take each day as it comes, go to sleep when the sun sets and wake when it rises, live with the Earth not against it, and learn as much as I can. Fear no. 1: get bitten to death, quite literally, leishmaniasis and malaria are a real danger; Fear no.2: my project doesn’t go to plan or I don’t manage to prove my hypothesis; fear no. 3: not having access to a well-rounded vegan diet. I had to think hard about those fears as I don’t really get scared or anxious about things.

Let the adventure begin.

ChiroEurope 2017

| Sophie

ChiroEurope is a conference that occurs twice a year, spring and autumn, inclusively catering for Chiro’s, Chiropractic assistants, students, friends and family and anyone who’s interested in Chiropractic care. The long weekend consists of a series of speakers who aim to challenge, support, inspire, share their miracles, give advice and ultimately bring out the best in every single person in the room. Each speaker brings a touch of magic and positive energy which irrevocably infects each avid listener over the course of the weekend, leaving this feeling of elation and practical determination to start making positive changes in your own life, be it personally or professionally, or most probably both.

I had the fortune of attending ChiroEurope in April 2017 with my mum and her Chiropractic colleagues from the Cowes Chiropractic Clinic (CCC on the Isle of Wight). It was a four day event, held at the Hotel IPV Palace and Spa, situated in beautiful Malaga in southern Spain. The conference attracts students and professionals from all over the globe and was an amalgamation of some of the brightest and best minds of the chiropractic world, and I was honoured to be there as a guest. I was gifted this opportunity because, conveniently, my mum knows me pretty well and after having gone the year before, thought that I would really enjoy it and get a lot out of it so I was invited along by Rebecca and will be eternally grateful for the kindness they showed me.

Let me introduce myself. I’m a current student of Manchester Uni studying Biomedical Sciences, purely because I love learning about how the human body works and have a passion for health and making people better. I live by a holistic health philosophy and anything that promotes wellbeing and happiness. Before ChiroEurope, I had had a few chiropractic treatments and decided that I liked Chiropractic and that it matched my beliefs and outlook on life. I didn’t know too much about the science or the methods, but I let my curiosity guide me, and found something that I now truly love, and will be a consistent part of my health routine (just as important as eating right and exercising) for the rest of my life.

Those four days took me on a journey of self-reflection and reconnection, culminating in a love for the profession that I never thought I would have. ChiroEurope has taken me from a position of curious observation, to literally wanting to marry a Chiropractor so I can be a part of that world forever. My list of criteria for the love of my life has been drastically shortened and now contains just that one item. And for good reason. I think to become a Chiropractor, your main aim in life has to be to do good and to help people. For those of you reading who don’t know much about Chiropractic, don’t worry, neither did I, and I want to share with you everything that I learnt. I imagine that even a lot of Chiropractors and students have no idea what their own potential is until they experience ChiroEurope. It will open doors inside your mind you didn’t even know were there; introduce you to choices you didn’t know you had; and enable you to adjust in an inspired way in order to do the most good.

For you non-Chiro’s, an adjustment is just a manipulation of the spine in order to remove nerve interference. Let me explain that. Every second, thousands of messages are being sent around your body in order to communicate and work efficiently. Your body is a powerful, dynamic, miracle that is capable of self-regulation, self-renewal and self-repair. Your body can heal itself. Do your wounds gape open forever when you get cut, or do they close? You have a power within your body, a life force, whatever you want to call it, that is able to heal itself and grow. The power that made your body, can also heal your body. It’s unequivocal. Your body has an immune system that works tirelessly to fend off harmful invaders, or anything that threatens the overall health of the whole. Our digestive system turns what you eat, into you. It really is true, you are what you eat. You are that coffee you drank this morning and that chocolate you ate last night. It gets broken down, and turned into lots of little molecules and chemicals which get incorporated into your eyes, heart, skin, blood, everything. Our brain is a beautifully designed processor and communicator which can simultaneously coordinate millions of actions, with the ultimate goal of survival, health and love. We have evolved lots of clever ways of transmitting these messages around the body so that it all functions in harmony and in health. These messages include electrical and chemical impulses through our neurons which travel out of the brain, down the brain stem and then exit out into the body. And what Chiropractic does, is it removes the interference between your brain and your body by adjusting and aligning the spinal cord so it can protect the most important part of you: the brain and brain stem. Unfortunately as humans, we tend to get injured a lot, and our lives are built around habit; habits put strain on the body. A repeated movement can cause your skeleton to become misaligned, and put pressure on certain neurons, causing them to over and under fire, messing with the natural balance of the body. Chiropractic treatment removes these pressures, allowing the body to function at its optimal. A misconception is that Chiropractors only deal with posture, back pain, neck pain and headaches. Vitalistic Chiropractors unlock the body’s innate potential, and allow it to do what it does best.

This was ChiroEurope. Even as a non-Chiropractor, I still felt the awe and admiration for all that our bodies do, and the absolute dedication to healing that all of these chiropractors had; a complete faith in the brilliance of the human body, and a calling to help as many people as possible.

All the guests and speakers shared this passion for health, happiness and humanity. Some were more practical, and gave direct advice in successfully building your own practice, gaining new clients, managing, marketing, communicating etc. And some were there to plug you in, turn you on, and charge you up; sharing their enthusiasm, passion and love of life. There were lots of miracles shared on the ChiroEurope stage which left you tingling and breathless, but a lot of miracles in Chiropractic often happen beneath the surface, where you can’t always see what’s going on. The nature of our Western society is to need a quick fix for everything, and where sometimes Chiropractic is a quick fix, more often than not restoring the natural balance of the body holistically and sustainably actually takes a little while and requires a bit of perseverance.

So I can whole-heartedly say that the Chiropractic profession has a new advocate with a fairly loud voice (metaphorically of course, I won’t be wandering the streets shouting at everyone to go and see a Chiropractor, not often anyway), and I promise to pass on this knowledge to anyone who is open-minded enough to listen. So, on a final note, my last piece of advice, GO AND SEE YOUR CHIROPRACTOR.

#VEGCURIOUS ?

| Sophie

(A post written for the Mancunion – The Manchester Uni student newspaper).

Definition: someone who is interested in exploring veganism and experimenting with vegetables in new ways, but not quite ready to commit.

Been having some affectionate thoughts about vegetables lately? Perhaps you’ve been wondering about alternative sources of protein but you’re not quite ready to talk about it with your mates? You might be what experts are calling ‘vegcurious’.

In the UK, over half a million people are completely vegan, almost 2 million are vegetarian and new figures are showing that many more people are vegcurious and want to know more about this plant-based lifestyle. In the US, the figures are even higher, and a staggering 40% of the population in India follow a vegan or vegetarian lifestyle. Veganism is drifting into the mainstream as research is showing that going vegan is a win, win, win situation. Good for the animals, good for the planet, and good for us.

Animal welfare and ethicality is of course still a really important issue, however it’s no longer the most popular reason for going vegan. Veganism is becoming as much an environmental cause as it is an animal welfare cause. Agricultural studies show that rearing cattle for food is the main effector of deforestation and has the biggest impact on global warming. A common misconception is that soy bean plants are causing deforestation, however 85% of these plants are used as feed for cattle and not human consumption, and therefore are also a part of the animal-product industry. Many of you will have heard the devastating news about the Great Barrier Reef last year caused by overfishing and global warming; moreover, the planets rapidly decreasing biodiversity is being dubbed by experts as the 6th extinction crisis. I think it’s time humans took responsibility for the harm we’ve caused, take a long hard look at the evidence and realise that it is the production of animal products for food which is exerting the greatest damage in our environmental crises.

If you’re not much of an environmental activist, that’s fine. But surely you care about yourself? Your health? With the popularity of veganism growing, so has the demand for scientific studies identifying the effect of this diet on your body, and whether or not a plant-based diet is able to provide adequate nutrient acquisition. The results are astounding, and show that not only is a vegan diet adequate, but it also decreases your risks of getting various diseases including different forms of cancer, obesity, cardiovascular disease and even osteoporosis. However, the risk of certain deficiency’s are higher in vegans because most people were never taught how to eat a well-balanced, vegan diet and therefore miss out key macro and micronutrients, and it’s important to transition your body safely into this new lifestyle as it is quite a drastic change in diet if you’ve always been a meat eater.

So if you’re a transitioning vegan or a conscientious meat-eater, make sure you’re filling your plate with balanced, nutritious foods that are going to supply you with the complete repertoire of nutrients your body needs. And try and be a little friendlier to vegetables.

How to kick-start your solo travels

| Sophie

Travelling on your own can be a daunting and even seemingly impossible prospect. Glorified blogs and epic Instagram accounts make it seem like only the most accomplished travellers dare to wander the world independently, risking their lives everyday and partying with new people every night. These travellers usually have expensive GoPro’s and movie editing software, endless streams of money and a seemingly innate ability to talk to anyone.

However, from my own experience, I can tell you that it’s not as glamorous and scary as it seems. Most solo travellers are people who decided to set off on a path of self-discovery, step out of their comfort zone, take a few risks and ended up accidentally on a whirlwind adventure. The trick to travelling is to keep putting one foot in front of the other. No matter where you end up, who you meet, what you loose, what you find… just keep moving forward and don’t give up. You will learn how to make the next step after you’ve taken the last. There are lots of ways to ease yourself into life on the road that will make you answer the question ‘how did you find travelling on your own?’ with a confident ‘I was never on my own’ when you get home from your adventure, full of pride and amazing memories.

Now you’re all inspired to organise your first solo journey, I’ll give you a few tips on how to get going. There are several ways to start your travels, but the main ways are working, volunteering, backpacking or couch-surfing.

WORKING. Do you want to get travelling now but just don’t have the cash saved? Work your way around the world and you’ll never have to stop. The beauty of being prepared to work is that you can keep going for as long as you like. Whenever you’re close to running out of money, put down some roots and get a job wherever you are at the time. Working holiday visa’s for 18 – 30 year old’s are pretty easy to get for Australia, New Zealand and Canada. Buy yourself a visa, book 1 week in a central, popular hostel in a city of your choice, catch a flight, and get job searching once you’re out there. Look on gumtree, pop into STA, hand out your CV, speak to people and keep your standards low. My first job in Sydney was door to door sales. I quit after a week but I ended up moving in with the people I met on the job (who also quit after a week) and we became really great friends. Alternatively, you could get a seasonal job. Popular winter seasonal jobs are Ski Seasons: getting these are as simple as googling, emailing and persevering. During summer, you could work in a bar/restaurant in a party town around Europe, to do this you’ll either need to go through an agency online, or just rock up and start handing out CV’s. If the drink all day and party all night life just isn’t for you, you could get a job as an activities leader. Camp America is great if you don’t need to save, or you could try In2Action who supply activity coordinators to Holiday Villages all around Europe (and 2 outside of Europe). I worked in Tunisia for 4 months and absolutely loved the experience! Another avenue you could go down is working on a cruise ship! Whether you’re an entertainer, singer, dancer, restaurant staff member or cleaner, you’ll be paid to tour some of the most beautiful places in the world. Another option for those of you who want to travel a bit more permanently, is to do a TEFL (Teach English as a Foreign Language) course. This enables you to teach in schools all over the world, earn a decent salary and really immerse yourself in a new culture.

VOLUNTEERING. If there’s something more specific you want to do, maybe this is the way forward. The International Citizen Service is a great place to start if you want to really make a difference in a small community by working on a project. Their website is very helpful and the great thing about ICS is that all you have to do is fund raise £800, and all other costs are paid for. Something I’m desperate to do once I’ve finished University is to volunteer at a Yoga and Surf retreat. These are found all over the world (I want to go to Sri Lanka!) and usually say if you work in a cafe/restaurant for free, then you have access to surf equipment and yoga classes at their facility. If you want to volunteer while on the move, you can work for bed and board. This includes WWOOFing, (a popular option in Australia) or working in a hostel, on reception or cleaning, in return for free accommodation.

BACKPACKING. There are so many organised tours out there, visit STA or have a google to find some of the most popular tours for solo travellers. These are great for the first couple of weeks as you usually end up meeting some people you can stick with once the tour is over, and they give you a good feel for a new country whilst keeping you totally safe. Down side is these are a little more expensive. If you don’t fancy a tour, just rock up to a new place having pre-booked a popular, suitable hostel and researched a bit about the area and what you want to do there, and start making friends! People are much friendlier in hostels than they are anywhere else in the world – I promise. If you’re more organised, then plan your journey and your accommodation in advance. If you’re more spontaneous (like me) and get a thrill from last minute decisions and not knowing where you’re going to end up, then just book the first few days and see where life takes you.

COUCH SURFING. This one is fairly self explanatory! Get signed up on the couch surfing website, build a profile, and plan your journey. The benefits of this mode of travel is that you get to hang out with locals who can point you in the direction of some hidden gems as well as the obvious tourist attractions. The downside is that you may feel a little bit vulnerable if you don’t feel comfortable staying in other peoples homes.

So hopefully you now feel equipped with a wealth of knowledge about how to plan and implement your solo travels. Good luck! Find yourself, loose yourself, take lots of selfies – and don’t be scared to ask strangers to take your picture!! – and take care.

C-section babies 40% more likely to develop Asthma

| Sophie

According to a Danish study, babies born via C-section are more likely to be hospitalised more frequently and develop immune disorders such as asthma, allergies and diabetes.

The exact cause of this isn’t clear, and the operation itself is not likely to be the direct cause of these effects, so what could it be?

Recent research has shown the essential role that our gut flora play when it comes to our physiology and even behaviour. Our gut has been dubbed our ‘Second brain’ and this term could be a lot truer than we currently know. During vaginal birth, the baby picks up the bacteria present in the vaginal canal which is the first bacteria the baby comes into contact with.

The second lot of bacteria babies are exposed to are in breast milk. It’s vitally important to breast feed (if you can), and not to rely on formula (if you have the choice – I understand that breast feeding isn’t an option for a lot of women); non-breast fed babies are more likely to have frequent infections and childhood obesity. There are also increased risks for mothers who don’t breast feed like post natal depression and a higher risk of some diseases.

The combination of vaginal and breast milk bacteria sets up the foundation of the ecosystem living within our bodies and determines the bacterial species likely to take up residence within us.

This could be a possible explanation for why babies born by caesarean have decreased immune function in later life.

Our gut flora plays a role in breaking down food, modulating the immune system, protecting against pathogens and maintaining the gut mucosal lining. We have evolved with these species and rely on them for a lot of functions that our own bodies can’t perform. Research has shown that they also play a role in modulating behaviour and mood. It seems that sayings we’ve used for years: ‘gut feeling’, ‘following your gut’ etc. could be more accurate than we previously thought. The complex arrangement of signalling neurons that make up our enteric nervous system links the gut very closely to the brain, hence why we ‘feel’ emotions in our stomachs.

I understand that motherhood and birth are very personal, very sensitive issues; and the aim of my post is only to make people aware and to educate. To any expecting mothers, congratulations and I wish you all the best. And to all current mothers, you’re all amazing, you don’t get told it enough but you are.

The strength in optimism

| Sophie

 

Optimism,

to have hope,

to believe that the good will overcome the bad in some way, shape or form.

Sometimes optimists can get a bad rep for wearing rose-tinted glasses,

and believing the best in a person or situation,

even though you get let down time and time again.

It may be seen as weakness, or ignorance, or immaturity.

But I’m proud to be an optimist.

And I believe that it’s the hope and the ability to see the silver lining that gives us strength.

We are strong enough to be hurt,

and to be sad,

and to grieve and mourn for people that we don’t even know,

animals we have never met,

battles we will never face,

wounds we will never feel,

and STILL pick ourselves up every day and see the wonder in this world.

Despite all the sadness in front of us,

we still get up in the morning and keep looking towards the future.

We still have hope for future generations and for the future of this Earth.

Being an optimist doesn’t make you weak,

for fighting fair and refusing to sink to a more hurtful level.

We don’t need to put someone else down to make ourselves feel good.

We make others feel better in order to make ourselves feel good.

Optimists are strong enough for 2 people,

we don’t suck the happiness out of someone else to fuel our own,

we give happiness and we give love and it’s in that generosity and genuine care that we feel fulfilled.

Strength lies in your ability to forgive,

to understand,

to be compassionate,

to still try and be good,

even though it’s really really hard not to feel hate, or be selfish, or be lazy.

That is strength.

That continued commitment.

Strength isn’t being nastier than someone,

being bigger and stronger,

being the one more willing to push someone until they break.

Strength isn’t who can shout the loudest,

who can win a popularity contest,

who can list more achievements.

Strength is being able to put one foot in front of the other every day,

to keep going,

to keep smiling,

to keep seeing the beauty in your life despite all the misery.

Strong people are the people who value happiness and love.

Strong people value other people.

They value other life.

They can see that all life is created equal.

And they can see that although we were all born equal,

we weren’t all bought up equal,

 and that some people have a lot of hate,

a lot of resentment and a lot of insecurities

that they need to put onto other people because it’s the only way they can take it off of themselves.

Strong people don’t have hate, so they don’t need to hate others to take a break from hating themselves.

If you’ve gained your strength from putting people down,

you have the strength of one person,

and it’s a fickle, shallow, transient strength you’ve stolen.

If you’ve gained strength from helping the people around you,

being kind, being considerate, making other people feel special and appreciated,

then you have the strength of a network of good people.

Whatever kind of person you are,

just remember that the way you feel about the people around you is more a reflection of yourself than a reflection of them.

And remember that only you are in control of your emotions,

and I for one would much rather be happy,

than seem strong.

 

New Years Resolutions

| Sophie

Achievable Resolutions

Not a ‘New Year New Me’, more of a ‘Me with some improvements’, set of resolutions. I know that if I set myself a goal which is too far away from my current lifestyle, I’ll be setting myself up for failure and disappointment. So I’ve got a couple of resolutions which, hopefully, are quite achievable; and might even inspire a couple of other people as well, hence why I’m sharing them here.

The power of Habit

Habit is a very powerful tool that people don’t take advantage of often enough. When we repeat behaviours over and over, we form neuronal connections that make it easier for us to go back to that behaviour. At first something is a conscious effort, but eventually it becomes unconscious and we do it naturally.

My new years resolutions are to develop little behaviours and repeat small affirmations to myself daily in order to keep improving who I am.

Small Talk

One thing I really want to try and do more is small talk. I often look for meaningful interactions and deeper conversations and get a little bored of preliminary questions and shallow chit-chat; however I’m starting to appreciate the value of that little bit of extra effort to start a conversation and get to know people a little better. I’m great at listening and I’m always interested in what people have to say, but I’m not very good at initiating a conversation and pushing through the uncomfortable first 5 minutes. But practice makes perfect!

Affirmations

I feel like affirmations are so powerful yet undervalued. I want to set myself a mini personal goal per month, come up with an affirmation to support this, stick it up on my wall and repeat it to myself every single day in the mirror. It sounds silly but it really works! When you tell yourself something over and over again it sticks in your mind, and when you’re faced with a situation that you could potentially handle badly, the affirmation which you’ve glued into your subconscious will pop into your head and remind you to choose the enlightened decision.

My January affirmation is: “As I forgive myself, it becomes easier to forgive others. I move beyond forgiveness to understanding and I have compassion and kindness for all.“

I set really high standards for myself which isn’t very productive as I’m often left feeling bad about what I’ve accomplished because I always feel like I could do/be/have more. Also I feel like I sometimes reflect my standards for myself on to other people, expecting them to also strive for the same things. So my affirmation is designed to help me let go of constantly needing perfection in my life, and just to live and let live a little more.

Good luck in 2017 🙂 

A Poem For My Grandma

| Sophie

My grandma died a year ago today, and in the days after her death I wrote this poem, kind of by accident. I woke up one morning with the first few lines in my head, then spent the next 2 days bent over my notebook writing the rest. I ended up reading it out at her funeral.

A few points of information; Zap was her dog who we looked after after her death, but who also sadly passed away this year. And my grandma was an actress and a lover of classical music. She’s been greatly missed as she was a huge part of my family’s lives as she lived just up the road. May she rest in peace.

 

It’s funny, you know, when you think of death;

The last thing you think of is your own blood and flesh;

It happens to your friends, and to the people that you know;

You never think that you’ll know the person that will go.

 

Yes, okay, you have nightmares that haunt you when you wake;

But you pull yourself together and you give yourself a shake;

But this time it is not a dream, it’s very real and true;

I’m pulling, shaking, pinching, waking, it’s not working – it’s no use.

 

She’s gone, she’s really gone I realise, but somehow it’s not right;

We’ve all been robbed, her life was stolen on that awful night;

She wasn’t even ill or sad, there was so much left in her;

We all thought we had years to go, to enjoy her love and laughter.

 

So all that’s left, all that we’ve got, our collective memories;

I’d like to share mine with you now, a moment, if you please.

 

I’ll think of her when Zap looks at me with her big, brown, silky eyes;

Her questioning and searching gaze, waiting, wondering why;

I’ll think of her when I perform to soothe my dreadful stage fright;

She taught me strength and courage through her guidance and advice.

 

She loved to sit and listen to me singing with piano;

My biggest fan, so proud of me, so pleased I loved it so;

I’ll think of her when I hear ClassicFM on the radio;

She’ll live on in every note and song, in every show.

 

She’d want me to play and sing here, but I’m sorry grandma, I can’t;

Too personal with all these people, to reveal my broken heart;

But I promise to always think of her when I play or sing, or both;

In mind and spirit she’ll be there, listening and singing also.

 

Everyone here will hold a dear place for her in their heart;

Everyone will express their grief in their own way and play their part;

But for me, grandma is a song: bold, triumphant and joyful;

With rich, loving chords, a dominant melody, so beautiful and remarkable.

 

She was a source of love and light, of wisdom and support;

A source of laughter, logic, care and of course much more;

I’m so grateful for what she’s given me already, my dear grandma;

She’s shaped me as a person so lives on in me forever.

 

I won’t say goodbye to her, but goodbye for now;

I’ll see her again someday, after life, in death, somehow;

She’ll be watching over us, of that I’m completely sure;

Now I have a guardian angel to protect me evermore.

 

Thank you all for coming and for honouring her life;

A sister, daughter, mother, grandma, friend, girlfriend and wife;

We love her all so very much, that love will never die;

In heaven now, at peace and rest, she’s watching from the sky.